It’s common to hear someone say how a departed loved one is “watching over us now,” and sometimes the statement is appended by, “s/he is feeling so proud of” the children left behind.

Thinking this might help our emotional and mental state but it is detrimental to our spiritual health for the simple reason that it is not biblical.

Nowhere in the Bible does it say that we become omnipresent when we die. We do not become like God. If that phrase is familiar, it came from the lying mouth of the serpent that deceived Eve in the garden.

When we enter into the presence of God, we will witness things that are far greater than what we have seen in our earthly lives that we will be so taken in and forget everything else.

I remember being at a posh country club when Vilma Santos entered the room and filled it with her presence. No one moved, no one spoke. All our eyes were on her. After she was done talking to her husband, she turned around and waved to all of us. As soon as she left the room, we all went back to our interrupted activity but we couldn’t talk about anything else but her. I’m not even a Vilmanian.

I think that’s how we will be when we are in heaven with God, that we can’t think and do anything else but just be awed by Him, as well as be fully aware of how unworthy we are (Isa. 5:24, 6:5). We won’t be saddled by things that we have left behind on earth. I don’t know if we will remember our loved ones or if we will recognize each other but what I do know is it will not matter. Only God’s presence matters. We will all be God-struck forever and ever.

Some cite the clouds of witnesses of Hebrew 12:1 as proof that departed loved ones are among us. The verse should not be taken literally but as a figure of speech. Also, they are not our witnesses, but God’s witnesses that if they were able to do it, so can we. It’s like being inspired by the bravery of Rizal and Ninoy.

And then some say, “When I get to heaven, I will ask God this and that.” No questions will come out of our mouths in His presence, only praises.

Now some might think that boring but can you imagine seeing a major Hollywood star or your favorite K celebrity in person? You will probably still be gushing about it decades from now (like my Vilma encounter) and will keep using your selfie with them as your profile pic forever.

But I think things will be different for those who reject the free gift of salvation in Christ.  They will be haunted forever by the memory of their loved ones who might suffer the same fate. This is what we learn from the parable of the rich man and Lazarus who became an instant missionary-sender and evangelist when he found himself in hell. And although it’s not stated in the Bible, I think memories are all they would have. They will not know what’s happened after their passing. They will not know for eternity if their loved ones are also suffering alone in regret for not choosing what truly matters in life, which is the afterlife.