“Would you still listen to a church leader who has asked for forgiveness after admitting to an affair with another man’s wife and had her husband killed to cover it up so no one would be the wiser when the woman gives birth a few months later?” I asked my bible study group who predictably said no. “Well, now, then let’s rip off the book of Psalms because that’s what David did.” The group was now quiet.

Forgiveness is often taught in church but seldom practiced accordingly. We have so many excuses not to forgive that we resemble the unforgiving servant more than the king in the parable in Mt. 18:23-35. When we refuse to forgive, we are saying that the offenses against us are greater than our own offenses against God. As a result, we make ourselves greater than God who is willing and able to forgive.

I started reflecting upon this topic upon reading a pastor from whom I learned a lot being accused of financial mismanagement by giving a personal gift to a friend in need using church funds. It is also being alleged that he had once looked for a hitman to kill his former son-in-law whom he fears has posted pornographic photos of his daughter.

Sad as the situation may be, it is sadder that some people are already condemning him even though his guilt has yet to be proven. I can just imagine how things will be when he is convicted since already there are accusations of hypocrisy and questioning his Christianity. But shouldn’t we all the more be compassionate with him if this were the case? And if he’s a brother in Christ, shouldn’t we exercise spiritual familial compassion especially if he is asking for forgiveness (Eph. 4:32)?

If we are going to refuse to forgive the “hypocrite,” we might just as well do the same thing to:

• Noah who shamed himself by being drunk and naked
• Abraham who lied about his relationship with Sarah---twice
• Isaac who was a terrible father
• Jacob who was a conman
• Joseph who was tactless
• Moses who was hot-tempered
• Samson who was self-indulgent
• Jesus’ disciples who were cowards

We would be reading a lot thinner Bible if we took over from the Holy Spirit in writing Scriptures and editing out these hypocrites.

“But he did something terrible.” Forgiving does not mean we pretend it didn’t happen in the same way that God is not pretending that we were never sinners. He just remembers that we had asked for forgiveness. And we must do the same for any erring brother and sister in the faith who is humbly seeking forgiveness. We are commanded to do so otherwise suffer the same fate of the unforgiving servant who was subsequently punished by the king who heard about his treatment of his fellow servant. The unforgiving servant was tortured in jail not for not paying his debt because the king remembered how he has forgiven his debt, but for not showing the same compassion and forgiving his fellow servant. The king even called him “wicked.” So not to forgive is being wicked which puts the interrogation light on us. Perhaps we cannot forgive because it is we who are really the hypocrites? And perhaps this can explain certain circumstances in our lives as a result?