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S/HE

“GRETCHEN DIEZ COMES OUT

She's the new poster girl of the Philippine LGBTQ+ movement. Arrested and shamed for needing to use the toilet. This is her story.”

So goes the headline and introduction of a Rappler story on the ongoing saga of the CR issue. Obviously, it wants to tell the “origin story” (their words, not mine) of one of the two central characters but the commenters hijacked it by zeroing in on the use of the female pronoun when the male genitalia is still intact. At least that’s what I gleaned from their statement that “(w)ith or without a dangling organ, they are women.”

It’s also the same reaction when the male pronoun is used to refer to Jake Zyrus and Ice Seguerra who, as far as I know, have not crossed over fully. So the question is: what if we have the likes Gretchen, Jake, and Ice in our church? How do we refer to them?

Several years ago, I was in a prayer meeting and noticed a crossdresser in attendance. I was later partnered with Jennifer who offered to pray for me first. When it was my turn, I suddenly became conscious. How do I refer to Jennifer in my supplication? I then decided to just use a pronoun but came at a dilemma as to which one to use so I just prayed in Tagalog. I am sure Jennifer sensed the awkwardness on my part but chose to be nice and quiet about it. Reading this Diez article brought back that experience in mind and the realization that I am still stumped to this day so I asked for the opinion of a few pastors and some gay friends.

My gay friends said it depends on the person. If he sees himself as a he who just happened to prefer the same sex, the male pronoun is to be used. But if he identifies himself as a she, then he should be addressed as such especially if he has adopted a woman’s name like Diez has.

“Not so,” say my pastor friends. The male pronoun still has to be used because it’s the truth and we must be in truth (1 Jn. 3:18).

“What about the name? How should we call them?” I asked.

They say it depends on when we came to know them. If we knew them as Gregory or Charisse, then we must use those names and they would know why. But if we came to know them as Gretchen and Jake, then Gretchen and Jake it is as we minister to them in the hope that they will have an encounter with the Truth soon. It’s similar to having live-in couples in our congregation. We don’t turn them away but with much love and truth in our words and action, they will be convicted and turn from their sin (cf. John 4 & 8:1-11). We then look forward to the day when “there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents” (Luke 15:10) and testifies, “My name is Gregory, your brother in Christ” or “My name is Charisse, your sister in Christ.” 

“GRETCHEN DIEZ COMES OUT

She's the new poster girl of the Philippine LGBTQ+ movement. Arrested and shamed for needing to use the toilet. This is her story.”

So goes the headline and introduction of a Rappler story on the ongoing saga of the CR issue. Obviously, it wants to tell the “origin story” (their words, not mine) of one of the two central characters but the commenters hijacked it by zeroing in on the use of the female pronoun when the male genitalia is still intact. At least that’s what I gleaned from their statement that “(w)ith or without a dangling organ, they are women.”

It’s also the same reaction when the male pronoun is used to refer to Jake Zyrus and Ice Seguerra who, as far as I know, have not crossed over fully. So the question is: what if we have the likes Gretchen, Jake, and Ice in our church? How do we refer to them?

Several years ago, I was in a prayer meeting and noticed a crossdresser in attendance. I was later partnered with Jennifer who offered to pray for me first. When it was my turn, I suddenly became conscious. How do I refer to Jennifer in my supplication? I then decided to just use a pronoun but came at a dilemma as to which one to use so I just prayed in Tagalog. I am sure Jennifer sensed the awkwardness on my part but chose to be nice and quiet about it. Reading this Diez article brought back that experience in mind and the realization that I am still stumped to this day so I asked for the opinion of a few pastors and some gay friends.

My gay friends said it depends on the person. If he sees himself as a he who just happened to prefer the same sex, the male pronoun is to be used. But if he identifies himself as a she, then he should be addressed as such especially if he has adopted a woman’s name like Diez has.

“Not so,” say my pastor friends. The male pronoun still has to be used because it’s the truth and we must be in truth (1 Jn. 3:18).

“What about the name? How should we call them?” I asked.

They say it depends on when we came to know them. If we knew them as Gregory or Charisse, then we must use those names and they would know why. But if we came to know them as Gretchen and Jake, then Gretchen and Jake it is as we minister to them in the hope that they will have an encounter with the Truth soon. It’s similar to having live-in couples in our congregation. We don’t turn them away but with much love and truth in our words and action, they will be convicted and turn from their sin (cf. John 4 & 8:1-11). We then look forward to the day when “there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents” (Luke 15:10) and testifies, “My name is Gregory, your brother in Christ” or “My name is Charisse, your sister in Christ.” 

Author

Elizabeth Ong

Elizabeth Ong is an author, lecturer, an app creator, and a businesswoman. She has a master's degree in Biblical Studies from Asian Theological Seminary.